Peace ! Find It please !

one more evening when it's that same thought of moving out. It's becoming more and more intense. Living in a jail. It's been quite lovely being with my very own family so "called" family. I am not very much in fact not a bit person who likes too many people dancing around me almost every possible moment when i am awake. Yeah I bite. Let me refresh what i am. Yes it's my blog. I have created this blog, thanks to web world. This is the place where i get my peace of mind. I am sorry you'll hear loads of "I" in here. So kindly leave if you are looking for any enter meantime zone. I mean i write what i feel like writing and you are reading so thanks.


First thing is the list of things which are disturbing or i am being disturbed of. Sounds interesting aey? I do not have many but if i have then why would i tell you that so anyway. so Rude. Yep I told you i am not your sweet thought no one remains sweet thought ever most of the times unless you have who matches your frequency of insanity-fantasy-reality-maturity-sensibility or any other activity you prefer. I have found mine so "smiles" I work for an international call center. Night shifts ??? you mean international ?? like most of the people who finds it alien expresses their love for us, reminds me you bum you work nights and we desis are every where. So even though one labels the place like call call center for international it's some what true geographically it's out of boundary of India. Now that's different surprise pack that after all this years of in-dependence we are kind of still running along with many illusions about which part belongs to which country and states. Which road, lane, street, city ,state and country is by which name. I truly believe change is good at times but what the fuck. This something which does not matter much to us unless we are really sure of what we like or what they knows what they like it. Am i making any sense what so ever? If your answer is yes, then press f5 (refresh) re-read if you are so keen to figure out otherwise stop and do one favor feed your self something relevant which gives you "your peace" or anything else which you are looking for.


I am waiting very much for many things which i had planned before this year began like usual but have not implemented any how i shall do it again but I'll plan it very much according where i can deliver it !


Strangers loves us more for some illusion or by any peculiar reason then we think but it's not much about who knows much it's more who matters to us !! I have had many strange reasons where i thought i have understood kind of unknown people but i was still a stranger but it was good knowing them it was indeed precious bit of my unsure wandering mind.

Why take a chance on a frozen throat?

It is again the time of the winter season where many things comes along and stays till you actually get feel of it. I got mine when i got up today frozen throat. I tried to call my nephew he was scared but obvious my vocal codes were almost sounding as if i was growling on some metal stuff. I suddenly had this thought that I hope my throat get at least little bit normal but it did not happen indeed happened which was least expected i got a call from my girl friend (Lovely Girl Fried) for about few seconds i was very not sure about what to say. I heard her tired but soothing voice i told hello in very irritating tone. I was not very sure initially how it'll sound to her but after my reply "my throat is frozen" she reacted very much like her absolutely sweetly but a bit angrily "if you are not feeling OK because of throat no point in talking, Bye" As far as my understanding goes she was annoyed. Like usual their goes another comment on face book for me. yeah right. Sounds very true in this situation when i hear " what ever will be will be" "joa hua soa hua" "Everything happens for a reason - if you want to figure out the reason keep fishing in it.


I failed to understand why it is so fucking stupid but it is still something funny to the world. Sky is still the same like the ground foot steps are very own frigging willingness is my call. I nearly lost her but this time I am damn sure she is not going any where i won't let her go in most possible way. Love you Anjana..........................

your shit(you+me)

I am not coming with any warning if i am writing this post for any one that's more about me and hidden emotions of mine. Yeah it's like saying myself " It's all about more of you in you, or me around me" Life is screwed up very much 360 view. Money is not something which every time poking fingers on me but other self created beautiful moment which are doing it.

It's true people die but everyday is special treat one tend to get obsessed with it or just show your (sexy delicious) back to me thinking easy way to escape pushing the tail down between frozen legs like a dog after getting a hard nail on 'em. Mine is not solely about hard ways to convince my partner but also other complimentary shadows of the cloud which are attached very much along with it.

Most annoying part i consider is if my partner expects me to say anything i feel like to her then we are sailing pretty much in a same way together but that does not seem to sound good/pleasant to her because all and all it turns out to be about my mood if anything and everything which starts till it ends. The reason being my tendencies to tell people about how i feel about my basic nature and other things which comes along. If i am honest that becomes big deal and it leads to an immense amount of pain where it just what you expect me to be. Just "real" just when i try to be it sounds to fucking unreal.

So fuck bottom line and moral (moron=me) of the story you can't dance on my head neither you fancy that i assume. And big yes- surely welcome if you want to be with me then I am accepting many things as much as i can afford to. I request you better ask your self what you can do about your shit(you+me) ?

With pleasure comes pain.....i love both of them

Still Standing

It's been long long very long I totally hate this I am very sure that it's not that hard to take time out my routine life. It's not like I am super busy running around but before i mention anything else i would like to let you guys know that i am in a relationship (yeah again said my inner voice) but this time i am sure about this. I know it's too early to say all this but that's what it is i guess. No second thought while saying that i am getting married with her but I know how life can be It's like we are so certain about few things so real yet unpredictable. It's such wonderful feeling but i would not say much about it because it's more of how you feel while you are in love one can't be very expressive about it when it comes but those who have been, i am dead sure most of us have been and felt like an eagle at some point of time of their lives. No worries if you have not come across as in relationship wise (not necessary one sided, 2 or multiples, it depends what you choose and what you get/achieve) it comes slowly it stays, at times it happens in a lighting speed and ends likewise. I am in the later category happened so fast we have this random arguments but i would not think it does not happen in any relation it surely does.


There are sense of insecurity, possessiveness,protectiveness , obsessiveness, fear of loosing the loved once, hurting someone, blame game, switching of the phones, sending hardcore status on social networks it is bound to come is more of matter of choice or rather how effective it is in most possible sense. Most of closet friends knows about my journey of finding my partner. This time I am most certain like never before in any means if at all some shit happens I know it happens and it has happened in the past with most of us I'll do every possible thing which i could humanly do to keep the matter with in our grip.


Thanks Biwi

Horniest season

It's another season of festival which just got over. Winter is slowly arriving. It's one of the most horniest season so here we come again. Expecting good weather. Missed my exams again this year as well. Just waiting for march 2010. I am really sure this year is the year for me. It's more then 79 days before this year ends. Still I have few things which are still on my priority bases. I am sick of my education label but it's my own misery I have to live with it till march 2010. It is not that I hate maths but how many exams I have to give I don't want to give the same subjects with my nephews and worse with my own kids. I have to pass this time. It's break on through to the other side kind of feeling now. It's reached it's boiling point. I am damn sure I'll start my classes once this December batches starts.

There was a time when we used to go for those house parties of my friend's friend party. Just because our friend wanted some frigging so called Company because they were boring that's what we were made to believe by our very own friend. We used go yeah we'll be there. We were always so available , free and wasted back then. If I look back to those days I feel miserable because of many things which has happened during all these years. I guess I am choking short of words may be it was more of poison is the cure for this feeling.

I am reading a book by Kaavya Viswanathan which I like but book is banned due to alleged plagiarism but I honestly don't mind reading irrespective the controversy. We'll finish till this weekend. Next book not sure I have many we'll pick anyone I love reading anyway.


Championship League has failed very much it is the most boring of T20 Cricket format so huh Lalit Modi. Have a break stop being so greedy.

Hitting the gym again from this weekend.

Got Good rating for my appraisal which has gone down from exception but I know I'll bounce back Let's do it never dies in me. So here I come.

I am very thankful for those who has posted on my comments specially to those anonymous bravos really appreciated it has helped me to work harder to improvise on my writing which I am doing because I love it, I know I can I'll as much as time permits me to write.

Just got robbed last night

After shift when achy called me to join them in kancha around 2:45am I reached met all my friend's. I was feeling something was going to happen I was not so very sure but what? For some reason I was not feeling like joining these guys but I did it against my will which i strongly believe was very stupid. I always follow my concious it works for me. In fact it worked at this time as well but It's my own mess. Just got a call from a friend was taking to her bag was kept aside while i was relaxing. There is link road which is really short cut to my house. Yeah Right. I was just taking This two gentlemen comes from their bike snatches my bag which was sitting just an inch away from me. I shouted at them "Oye Boss, No" , didn't utter a word for a while. Yeah was very happy wish I had kept some diwali fire crackers for them. I was very angry yeah obvious but still I am saying only because that was the right word. I have good vocabulary just like most of people to use abusive words to express my agony over bumps in life but I have chosen to use the word which it self describes what was indeed the case. I make it complicated vertigo is very normally my way. You see what I mean. I had my bag with my personal diary yellow my favourite where I jot down anything & almost most thing which I think is precious to me. My wallet off course, pan card, Bank cards, My Photographs with few of family members, Few visiting cards, House key, My mother's special tiffin box with remaining allo ka bhajii in it. Those saints shall enjoy that food because maa ka khanna. As I am writing now this which is precisely after 630 minutes later, why I remember this time I was on my cell when this scene was set I happened to gaze towards my cell thought how come they forgot this? My cell was only I found which was very handy at that time. Lodging Police complaint was not even last thing on my mind. I mean whom am I kidding cops. I was totally at still point frizzed to the core like never before. I tell you those guys have given me so special treat which was special indeed. I luckily had the last 50 bucks on my upper pocket with 12 rupees on my pant pockets saw meter on my cab was much higher then what I had but driver was present saw what happened heard my self talking to me in fact he didn't utter a word when I told me don't drop me till my house I'll have less money he dropped me and didn't ask for a single penny. I offered him all I had except of 12 bucks which Was remaining with me thought of buying train ticket. I was feeling bad about that auto driver because I was not able to pay-off I asked him, If he would like to my favorite watch he gave me this awkward kind of smile shook his head koi baat nahin. I have taken his auto Number will surely pay him off. Train was at 4:55am was listening to some good 'ol qawallies because at that time you won't find much people someone was playing that sort of music I really thought it was like some art film. Finally manage to catch that first train to home ticket less since counter was closed. What a wonderful world.

Few text which I sent to my friend while this happened.

Dude just got robbed

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I guess, that's what shit happens. They were maria's friend...Happy Birthday Gift..lol

PS: Maria is colleague of mine. It was her Birthday

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Walking, watching the clock is four 33 watching the clock it's time to stop - Better man robbed me God Bless him
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Penny less, ticket less ...what a life what a wonderful world........

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Deja'vu